A typical supercommuter spends 90 minutes or extra a technique commuting to work or college. As the price of dwelling continues to outpace wage progress, supercommuting is rising in reputation. In keeping with a latest U.S. Census Bureau report, an estimated 5 million folks are actually supercommuters—up from roughly 3.42 million in 2012.
I hate lengthy commutes. Taking the bus or driving to work was one in every of my prime three annoyances whereas I used to be employed.
Once I retired in 2012, one of many best joys was by no means having to commute once more. Getting again that point, power, and psychological readability was a really lifestyle-enhancing good thing about retirement. Then, when the pandemic hit in 2020, hundreds of thousands around the globe acquired to expertise that very same freedom. Is there any marvel why it’s been so exhausting to persuade employees to return to the workplace?
On this publish, I need to spotlight the hidden toll of supercommuting to work or college. Certain, you’ll spend extra on fuel in case you drive. However that’s just the start. So before you purchase a extra inexpensive residence in trade for an extended commute, be forewarned: the trade-offs might not be value it.
My Expertise With Supercommuting
After deciding to not pony up a small fortune for a trip rental in Honolulu, I opted for my household of 4 to stick with my mother and father for as much as 5 weeks. They’ve three free bedrooms of their five-bedroom home, and it’s a house I’ve returned to for 39 years. It feels snug to me, however to not all.
A few of you thought this was a great way to economize. Others—largely girls—stated it was merciless to topic my spouse to such “confinement” for thus lengthy. I get it. Staying along with your in-laws for quite a lot of days is quite a bit to ask, particularly with out en suite loos or separate kitchens and entrances. And never all people likes to be in Hawaii through the summer time warmth.
Nonetheless, the most cost effective appropriate three-bedroom rental I may discover value $16,000 after taxes and charges. A nothing fancy four-bedroom rental, with out a pool, which we preferred, was $24,000. After proudly owning actual property since 2003, I simply can’t carry myself to spend that a lot on a brief keep that builds no fairness.
To discover a compromise, we stayed at my aunt and uncle’s place on the North Shore—as much as 1.5 hours away—after 13 days with my mother and father, to provide each my spouse and mother a break for 9 days. It gave me a break too as I may return to dwelling with out fear of doing issues in a manner that might agitate my mother, e.g. lower fruit on the suitable aspect of the sink as an alternative of the left.
The children had been pleased wherever they had been, so everybody received, effectively, aside from me who needed to drive ~2.5 extra hours a day for 5 days.
The False Begin
We picked up our youngsters at 4:55 p.m. Friday from summer time college at Punahou to go to Laie for the weekend. All was effectively—till six minutes in, our five-year-old daughter introduced she needed to pee. I rotated and went again to highschool so she wouldn’t have to carry it.
Had we been commuting from my mother and father’ home, simply eight minutes away, I’d’ve simply saved driving. That’s one sudden value of supercommuting—having to handle bodily features mid-ride. Most adults can uncomfortably maintain it for an hour or two. However children? Not a lot.
We lastly arrived in Laie an hour and half-hour later. The children napped for 35 minutes, so the journey felt like a breeze to them. Though I used to be drained, I used to be additionally excited to benefit from the freedom of getting our personal house once more.

The Monday Morning Supercommute
After a enjoyable weekend stuffed with Pokémon Go Fest, Giovanni’s garlic shrimp, and seashore walks, actuality returned Monday morning.
I handed out by 10 p.m. Sunday after placing the youngsters down by 9:20 with my spouse. I awakened at 2:45 a.m. to get a head begin on publishing a brand new publish, responding to feedback, and going for a morning stroll on the seashore.
The children awakened at 6:30 a.m., and we left by 6:55 to make it to highschool by 8. Again in Honolulu, we normally depart at 7:40, so the sooner begin was uncomfortable for my spouse and daughter, who aren’t morning folks.
Straight away, I may inform the drive would take longer than anticipated. We had been caught behind a gasoline tanker on a single-lane highway for about 15 miles, averaging simply 32 mph as an alternative of the same old 40.
About 45 minutes in, I acquired a textual content from my spouse thanking me for the trip and the peace and quiet. At a cease mild, I couldn’t assist replying with a GPS screenshot to indicate the place we had been—7 minutes not on time. Often, the GPS arrival time was conservative and straightforward to beat.
However then I made a mistake. I resumed driving whereas glancing on the screenshot I had despatched her as an alternative of the dwell Apple Maps. That mind fart value us one other 11 minutes. As an alternative of arriving at 8:06 a.m., we acquired to highschool at 8:16. Ugh—I hate being late.

A Place To Dangle Out Made Supercommuting Extra Manageable
At first, I believed I’d simply hang around on the seashore or mall all day earlier than selecting the youngsters up at 4:55 p.m. My spouse additionally wished me to choose up some groceries. No drawback. There was no manner I used to be going to drive 1.15 hours again to Laie after drop off after which do it once more within the afternoon. I figured I’d nap within the automobile underneath a banyan tree if I needed to.
Then I remembered my mother and father’ home was solely 8 minutes farther. I may write, relaxation, and handle the renovation of an in-law unit I used to be engaged on. Having a house base made the day rather more manageable. If I needed to additionally work a full-time job throughout that commute, I’d’ve been fully wiped.
The truth is, after dropping off the youngsters, I spent the day within the metropolis writing a publish, recording a solo podcast episode, speaking to my mother and father, grabbing lunch, and squeezing in a fast 15-minute nap.
Then I handled the handyman, swung by Entire Meals for groceries, and picked up the youngsters at 4:55 p.m. The day flew by—and by the top of it, the considered driving quarter-hour to highschool and 1 hour and quarter-hour again to Laie throughout rush hour was the very last thing I wished to do.
The Subsequent Day of Supercommuting (Good Then Unhealthy)
By the second day of supercommuting, I felt extra assured. I knew the route higher and had realized from my errors. I acquired the youngsters to highschool 10 minutes early and shaved 20 minutes off the drive. It felt like a small win. However after all, good issues by no means final.
Once I arrived at my mother and father’ home the plumbers had already proven up early. Then, half-hour later, the handyman arrived. In whole, I spent 9 hours managing 5 completely different employees attempting to repair up our long-neglected in-law unit. I hate transforming and swore to by no means achieve this once more. However right here I used to be, like a masochist, doing it once more whereas I used to be speculated to be enjoyable on trip.
To benefit from the downtime, I introduced my laptop computer exterior and labored on a brand new publish. However with the solar blazing and temps hitting 85 levels, I used to be drained by mid-afternoon.
By 4:40 p.m., all I wished to do was lie down in an air-conditioned room and take a nap. However no such luxurious. I needed to hop again within the automobile, drive by means of rush hour to choose up the youngsters, then endure one other 1 hour and 13 minutes again to Laie.
My zest for all times? Gone. After 10 minutes of small speak with the youngsters about their day, I turned on some music and simply listened like a zombie. I didn’t have the power to maintain the dialog going.
By the point we acquired residence, I used to be toast—only a drained, barely grumpy dad who wished nothing greater than to relax and crack open a chilly beer.
Constructive Ideas To Intestine On By way of
Though I used to be commuting about 2.5 hours further a day, I instructed myself it was value it—for my spouse’s happiness, my mother’s privateness, and even my children’ resilience. Perhaps the longer commute would construct their endurance and educate them the worth of waking up early.
Maybe most significantly, my spouse appreciated the trouble I put in to make her pleased. Judging by her FaceTime calls from the seashore, she undoubtedly appeared extra relaxed and content material! With appreciation, I used to be motivated to maintain on supercommuting.
As a father, you do what you possibly can to supply. Somewhat further effort plus some problem-solving goes an extended solution to making a suboptimal scenario higher. Received to suppose optimistic! Up to now, it by no means occurred to me commuting from Laie to downtown Honolulu could be an choice.
Apart from, realizing the supercommuting stint was non permanent made it tolerable. My children had Friday off for the 4th of July, so I solely needed to supercommute for 4 days—a complete of ~11 hours of extra driving. Oh yeah, however I forgot about including the 2 halves of driving up Thursday evening and returning Monday morning. So extra like 13.5 hours of additional driving.
The Hidden Prices of Supercommuting
At first look, supercommuting may seem to be an inexpensive trade-off. Save 20–60% on housing and spend an additional two hours and thirty minutes commuting a day? Perhaps not so unhealthy, particularly if the median residence value is above $1 million.
However along with a whole lot extra in fuel and transit prices every month, listed below are different downsides:
- Elevated threat of damage or dying – Extra time on the highway means extra publicity to accidents, particularly when driving with children. I actually noticed a automobile on a residential avenue close to my dad or mum’s home flip upside-down as a result of it acquired t-boned at an intersection. One of many automobiles did not cease on the cease signal.
- Greater stress and cortisol ranges – Unhealthy drivers, site visitors jams, and highway rage add up, draining your emotional reserves for the day and night. You may find yourself growing power ache, elevate your stress ranges, and in the end, shorten your lifespan because of this.
- Put on and tear in your car – Extra miles imply extra upkeep, particularly in case your automobile isn’t ultra-reliable. You may even have to interchange issues extra typically, like your tires and brakes.
- Higher probability of getting tickets – From parking errors to dashing tickets, elevated driving time raises your possibilities of infractions. In flip, your automobile insurance coverage premiums may go up.
- Decreased happiness and concord along with your vital different – Lengthy commutes drain your power and endurance, which suggests by the point you get residence, you could be extra irritable, checked out, or simply plain exhausted. Small disagreements can flare up extra simply when one or each of you’re operating on fumes. Over time, the emotional toll of being bodily distant and mentally unavailable provides up.
If You Are Going To Commonly Supercommute
Should you plan to supercommute usually, two issues are crucial: a secure, dependable automobile and life insurance coverage.
My spouse and I’ve matching 20-year time period life insurance coverage insurance policies, which have offered large peace of thoughts. I like to recommend locking in an inexpensive coverage by means of Policygenius to cowl your money owed and defend your youngsters till they develop into adults.
Right here in Honolulu, nonetheless, we don’t have what I’d contemplate a safe-enough automobile for long-term supercommuting. We’re utilizing my dad’s 1997 Toyota Avalon. Whereas it’s a nostalgic beast, it has poor acceleration for evasive driving, a wobbly axle, shaky brakes above 45 mph, no aspect curtain or rear airbags, no blind spot detectors, no sensors, and no rear digital camera. I’m not even certain the entrance airbags work.
Because of this, I drive slowly and attempt to keep further alert. The one saving grace is that the velocity limits between the North Shore and Honolulu are comparatively low—35 mph on the single-lane “freeway” and 50 mph on the principle freeways. So it’s not like mainland highways the place folks routinely push 70–85 mph.
If we return to this similar dwelling and commuting association once more, I plan to hire a brand new automobile for $100/day. It’ll not solely be safer, nevertheless it’ll additionally unlock my dad to run errands through the week with his personal 28-year-old automobile. A win-win.
Ultimate Ideas on Supercommuting
Supercommuting may seem to be a wise monetary transfer, particularly when housing close to work is unaffordable. However earlier than you commit, look past the financial savings. Residing in a smaller home or condo to avoid wasting time commuting is my choice .
Each hour on the highway is an hour not spent along with your family members. Each anxious drive takes a toll in your temper, focus, and well being. And each sudden delay chips away at your endurance—particularly if you’re juggling the calls for of household life and work.
Personally, a comparable residence would should be a minimum of 70% cheaper to justify including two further hours of commuting every day. And even then, I’m undecided the trade-off could be definitely worth the toll on my time, power, and well-being. The time I get to spend with my children after college is just too treasured to sacrifice.
Should you dwell inside quarter-hour of each your work and your youngsters’s college, contemplate your self lucky. Whereas distant work surged through the pandemic, in-person collaboration has made a powerful comeback. Because of this, well-located properties in job-centric cities—particularly the place provide is constrained—might outperform sooner or later.
If you are going to supercommute, have a plan. Know your timeline. Perceive your causes. And ensure the trade-off is really value it. As a result of ultimately, a less expensive residence isn’t value it if it leaves you drained and hating life.
Readers, are any of you supercommuters? If that’s the case, how do you make the lengthy transportation time extra bearable? Are there any sudden advantages to supercommuting past saving on housing prices or being nearer to household or a greater college? I might love to listen to your methods and insights.
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